I’m sure that David Wain was just joking when he told MTV Movie’s Blog that there’s been talk of a musical adaptation of Wet Hot American Summer. But that hasn’t stopped me from thinking about it in depth. At first I was really excited. From the very beginning I’ve loved both the movie and its soundtrack (which I had to hand craft, since an actual WHAS album doesn’t exist) and would definitely be interested in seeing the whole thing acted out on stage. But now I’m realizing its a bad idea, and I’ve included that van crash scene as a metaphor for the concept. Sure, I would love to see the movie acted out on stage, but in the same way I loved watching my buddy play “Data” in an off-Broadway musical version of The Goonies. And in the same way I’d love to see the Con Air and Mystic Pizza musicals starring the fictional Jenna Maroney (winner of a NYC film critics award for Best Actress in a Movie Based on a Musical Based on a Movie). But is it something I can see really being any good? Not at all.

As much as I can imagine a singing can, and as much as I’d love to hear Paul Rudd sing a song about “Lindsay” tasting like burgers or about what a pain it is to clean up after himself or about his journal (pronounced gurnal — and rhymes with infernal, in case the lyricist is reading), I just couldn’t see all the characters, subplots and jokes making their way sufficiently onto the stage. And as the van crash is my most favorite gag in the film, I’d hate to see it unused (or used, since it just wouldn’t work the right way). Then again, if Wain and company could find a way to make it all fresh and have new, more theatrically appropriate humor, I would be first in line. And speaking of new material, how exciting is it that Wain (hopefully telling the truth) says he might shoot some kind of “new addendum” to the film for an upcoming special edition DVD? I’m suddenly not feeling as sorry that I lent my original WHAS DVD to a friend who never returned it.

Anyway, I don’t know if this is a coincidence, or if it’s even worth sharing, but tonight I was already planning to fondle some sweaters fondue with cheddar. I swear it’s true!