Corey Mburu Wainaina is 14 year old aspiring video game designer, honor student and one of the world’s greatest players of Super Smash Brothers. I could think of no better commentator with whom to discuss either the state of the nation or the state of summer movies. But, um, luckily we veered off on a far less boring Hancock tangent.

STEVEN BOONE: You have an interesting background. Your father is from Kenya and your mother is an American. Another African-American with heritage in Kenya is now famous around the world. What’s his name?

COREY WAINAINA: Barack Obama.

SB: What do you think about his candidacy?

CW: I think it’s nice, but (whispers) it doesn’t matter because it’s lies.

SB: What do you mean by that?

CW: The government. Killing dudes and joint.

SB: “Killing dudes and joint”? What does that mean?

CW: The corporations…

SB: Are you just repeating back to me things you’ve heard me say or–

CW: No, I’m smart.

SB: Where did you come by this information?

CW: The news.

SB: The news tells you about corporations killing people?

CW: Some black guy called in and was saying–

SB: What was this, C-SPAN?

CW: Yeah, and they were laughing at him. They said, “No, no, we don’t condone this kind of…”

SB: Who was laughing?

CW: Some white guys. The guy hosting the show, and some other guy who was there answering questions.

SB: What was it about what the black guy had to say that you found convincing?

CW: Said something like companies and corporations rule stuff.

SB: So they rule stuff. That doesn’t mean they kill people.

CW: Yeah, they tell the government to go kill people.

SB: So you think the corporations are more powerful than the government at this point?

CW: Yeah.

SB: Alright! Summer movies! I love summer movies. Ever since I was a kid, I’ve looked forward to the summer movie season. And here we are, summer movies, 2008. What are some of the movies you were looking forward to seeing this summer?

CW: Hulk.

SB: Let’s compare notes. What have you seen so far? Right now we’re about midpoint. This is mid-July.

CW: Hancock and Hulk.

SB: Okay, what’s your review of The Incredible Hulk?

CW: Eh, it was nice. 3 out of 5.

SB: Why?

CW: It was good. Wasn’t the best, though.

SB: What was it lacking?

CW: Joint.

SB: Joints? The Incredible Hulk should have been smoking joints?

CW: No, it was lacking some joint. Like Star Wars wasn’t lacking a lotta joint but The Hulk was lacking some joint.

SB: But what kinda joint was it lacking?

CW: Uhh, I don’t know!

SB: I think you do know!

CW: This is harassment.

SB: Okay, what did you like about The Incredible Hulk?

CW: Action.

SB: What kind of action?

CW: Uhhh, what do you mean what kind?

SB: What did the Hulk do? Was he doing martial arts? Was he throwing ninja stars–

CW: I like the part when Blonsky was attacking the Hulk when he was a human. Blonsky, that is.

SB: When they were fighting in Harlem?

CW: No, this was before he turned into Abomination.

SB: Oh, in the field.

CW: Yeah.

SB: When he bust out with that crazy gun.

CW: Oh, you saw that joint?

SB: Yeah. I saw the bootleg.

CW: That was my favorite part.

SB: Mine too. When he was tossing tanks.

CW: Nah, he was tossing some metal parts or something. But he did toss a tank before.

SB: How would rank it amongst superhero movies.

CW: Definitely not the best ever.

SB: What about versus the first Hulk?

CW: About the same.

SB: About the same? I thought this Hulk was kinda nasty-looking. He looked weird.

CW: I think the other Hulk looked more like the comic book.

SB: Yeah, this new Hulk looked like Don Imus.

CW: He was mad skinny.

SB: No, you’re talking about Bruce Banner.

CW: Nooo, the Hulk.

SB: You’re saying that this steroid-looking Hulk was skinny?

CW: Compared to the comic books, yes.

SB: Uhh, okay. I thought he looked bigger but was just ugly in the face.

CW: No, Ang Lee’s Hulk looked way bigger, more wide. This one looked like the TV show, almost.

SB: And Ang Lee’s looked a healthier shade of green.

CW: Yeah, like he’s supposed to look. And in this movie the Hulk didn’t heal as fast, like he’s supposed to. This movie was more like the TV show.

SB: Yeah, it looked like they might be reflecting back to the old TV show with Bill Bixby.

CW: Yeah, and that dude was in there. Lou Ferrigno. Security guard at the hospital. And he was the voice of the Hulk.

SB: Oh yeah? Cool. Okay, Lou getting a check after all these years. They should have had it where he busts out of his uniform and turns into a Hulk, too.

CW: Stan Lee turns into a Hulk.

SB: What are you smoking now?

CW: No, he drank that drink, in that cameo and he changed–

SB: I must have missed that part, been in the bathroom.

CW: It was in the beginning. And, um, Tony Stark shows up at the end.

SB: Now, let’s face it. These are white superheroes.

CW: Uh huh.

SB: Now, Hancock is a black superhero. Am I correct?

CW: Comedy.

SB: You don’t consider it a real superhero movie?

CW: It is, but it’s not serious.

SB: Well, neither was Iron Man.

CW: No, Iron Man was serious.

SB: What do you give Hancock?

CW: Two and a half.

SB: That’s low! Why?

CW: Fine, three.

SB: Your opinion is your opinion. Two and a half. But why, though?

CW: ’cause it was just a regular movie.

SB: Not enough action? Two much love stuff?

CW: Yeah, and a lot of blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah.

SB: What were you expecting of this film? Isn’t it inspiring for you as a young black man to see a black man standing up, flying around, fighting crime, saving people’s lives?

CW: Nah, he was drunk and joint.

SB: Was it a letdown when he was laying there in the gutter amongst empty liquor bottles?

CW: Yeah.

SB: What do you think that’s telling the kids?

CW: “Black people are retarded.”

SB: Did you expect that of Will Smith?

CW: No.

SB: What did you expect of Will Smith?

CW: I Am Legend.

SB: I Am Legend was a good movie, right?

CW: Yeah.

SB: I guess we’re saying we expect Will to be inspiring. What about the whole Obama thing? Is Obama inspiring to you?

CW: Yea. Well, kinda. I don’t want to be a politician.

SB: Right, but it’s about leadership, right?

CW: It’s kind of cool, but I don’t know if that’s gonna happen.

SB: Okay, what could have made Hancock better?

CW: Martial arts.

SB: Do you think it’s significant, the fact that Hancock’s an African-American superhero?

CW: Yeah.

SB: In what way?

CW: That he, you know, he… He… Ehh, it wasn’t significant.

SB: Wait, I think you think it is significant.

CW: Uhh, nah. It wasn’t. It was significant for him but not for black people.

SB: Why wouldn’t it be significant for black people? They never had a superhero up on the big screen before.

CW: Yeah, they have.

SB: Such as?

CW: I don’t know… Mr. T.

SB: He wasn’t a superhero. He couldn’t do anything but bust down doors.

CW: Men in Black.

SB: That wasn’t a superhero. He just had powerful, you know, FBI weapons.

CW: Ah, fine, whatever.

SB: But you did mention another black superhero before we rolled. Who were you talking about?

CW: Static Shock.

SB: Who the hell is that?

CW: (laughs)

SB: I never heard of that.

CW: A TV show that kids from Generation Y would know. Since you’re doing this for people who aren’t from Generation Y, they won’t care about that.

SB: I care. When did Static Shock come out?

CW: Uh, early 2000’s.

SB: And what does Static Shock do?

CW: He has static powers and he rides on this, like, garbage can joint–

SB: Hold on hold on hold on. He rides on a what?

CW: He rides on the lid of a garbage can.

SB I’ve heard enough!

CW: No, but later he gets a cooler suit, and he gets, like, some gadgets.

SB: So, like Hancock, he starts out in the gutter–

CW: No, he’s a regular kid and then there’s like a gang war and this explosion happens and then they all get super powers and then they’re called Bang Babies.

SB: It’s not sounding any better. Bang Babies. That sounds like some Bloods and Crips type stuff.

CW: That’s what they called them, I don’t know. The white people.

SB: White people created this show? Are you sure?

CW: No, no. The people in the show that were white.

SB: So that’s what they referred to them as in the show, Bang Babies? Like Crack Babies? Welfare Babies?

CW: Yeah, whatever.

SB: Wait, you sound defensive of the show. You liked the show? Was it a good show?

CW: Yeah. Good action.

SB: I don’t mean to beat a dead horse here, but what’s this lid-of-a-garbage-can business?

CW: He was at a dump and he was trying out–

SB: What was he doing at a dump?

CW: He wanted to try out his new powers. And then he started riding on these old cars.

SB: Wait, so he gets super powers and the first thing he thinks to do is go to a garbage dump?

CW: No, he just said, “Meet me at the dump”– ’cause he has a white friend. And his friend was like, “Alright.” And his white friend gets superpowers later on.

SB: Okay, where’s his white friend from and where’s he from?

CW: The same place.

SB: Is it a ‘hood?

CW: Hmm, nah, not really.

SB: So they’re middle class kids?

CW: Yeah.

SB: So it’s a middle class kid and his white middle class friend, and they get superpowers, but when the black kid gets superpowers his first thought is to go to a landfill?

CW: (laughs) No! He just went there to meet him, just to try out his powers ’cause they couldn’t go anyplace else. People would see them.

SB: Oh, it’s like when you go to learn how to drive, you go out to a big, empty lot.

CW: Yeah. He wasn’t really thinking. He just said, “Meet me there.”

SB: Okay. I don’t want to stir undue controversy. Well, do you think it’s a show people other than Generation Y should watch?

CW: Eh, I don’t think so.

SB: What is Generation Y?

CW: 1985 to 1995…?

SB: And what defines Generation Y?

CW: Umm…

SB: As opposed to Generation X or…

CW: Better television.

SB: You think that you have better television than my generation had?

CW: Than any other generation.

SB: That sounds like crazy talk. I’ll have to look into this. You never know…