I might as well get this out of the way first: I loved Baz Luhrmann’s epic Australia. I was on the fence about seeing this, especially once I heard about the 165 minute running time, but I gave in and boy was I glad. It’s a sprawling epic with nods to classic films of the 30s and 40s, and besides featuring the eye candy combo of Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman, it also introduces Brandon Walters, who is possibly the cutest child actor alive. If there was some sort of scientific cuteness scale, he’d break it.

Despite the beautiful vistas and the sweeping storyline, not everyone is loving it. After the press screening I attended, a bunch of us gathered on the street outside the theater to debate reactions. It was oddly dividing: people either hated it or loathed it. I’d spent part of the week with a friend from Australia, and he’d denounced it as cheesy, because they have two Aussies in the lead roles: Jackman doing a faux “crikey!” Australian accent, while Kidman actually has a faux British accent. He said most of his friends in Sydney felt the same way.

Here in the States, Australia’s detractors are saying a lot of the same things. So, I’m taking the top five critiques of Australia and refuting them. I might not be able to change the critics’ minds, but I’m hoping you’ll at least give the movie a chance in theaters. Spoilers ahead!

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

“Umpteen choruses of “Over the Rainbow,” the Wizard of Oz tune that is sung whenever a tear needs jerking.” Peter Travers - Rolling Stone

“You’ll also get a bit tired of hearing “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” and references to Oz again and again.” Tricia Olszewski - Washington City Paper

There’s a pretty strong effort by Luhrmann to link Australia to The Wizard of Oz, and not just with this song. However, I have to take issue with these two critics. Maybe they don’t remember the movie that well, but it’s not sung often. Kidman first performs a comical rendition of the song because she can’t remember the words to it, and later Nullah sees it on the screen, basking in the glow of his first movie ever. It is played on a harmonica several times, but that’s because it becomes the song linking Lady Ashley and Nullah together. When he tells her, “I’ll sing you to me,” he means with that song. When he inherits the harmonica from the ill-fated accountant, of course he’s bound to play it –a nd yes, your heart is made of black ice if you don’t feel a twinge or two whenever he does.

The Running Time

“Long before the second hour of Australia (which feels like the fifth)…” Lisa Schwarzbaum - Entertainment Weekly

“When this storyline is resolved at only ninety minutes, the film gets another fresh hour out of the bombing of Darwin by the Japanese in 1941…” Matt Goldberg - Collider

Yes, we get it: the movie is long. But where was it ever written that films should always be two hours long at max? If I’m being entertained and I’m still drawn in by the story, then I don’t mind how long it stretches on. Although I’m not lobbying for a director’s cut version of Australia that rivals Che in length, I certainly didn’t find the movie to be too long. Yes, there are separate story arcs throughout, but even when the movie is over, you’re still wondering what’s going on the the main characters. Especially Nullah, who heads off into the Outback on walkabout with his mystical grandfather.

It’s Sappy

“You may find yourself drowning in high-fructose Aussie corn syrup…” Michael Phillips - The Chicago Tribune

“Australia is what you get when the film projector overheats and the only thing that comes out is pure corn syrup.” Brandon Fibbs - BrandonFibbs.com

Can you name one Baz Luhrmann film that isn’t sappy and overtly saccharine at times? Strictly Ballroom, Romeo + Juliet, Moulin Rouge… they’ve all had those moments, so why would Australia be any different? It’s a sweeping epic fantasy love story, and if you can name any massive romance movie for me that doesn’t have even the tiniest bit of schmaltz in it, then I’ll buy your movie popcorn for a month. Several main characters get murdered in this story, aboriginal children are ripped from their homes, and the Japanese bomb Darwin, including a mission full of kids. If a filmmaker can’t balance that out with loads of happier moments and some cinematic sugar, then you’d just wind up with a depressing mess. You look for those cheesy moments to balance the mood, and even though in Luhrmann’s case you can see them coming from a mile away, they’re just as welcome.

The Special Effects Are Bad

“The CGI sequences – the cattle stampede, the Japanese bombing raid – that look so glaringly, absurdly fake” Tom Maurstad - The Dallas Morning News

“The BLUE SCREEN EFFECTS WERE DOWNRIGHT AWFUL. I felt like I was watching 10,000 B.C.” - Kevin McCarthy - Big Daddy Kev’s Movie Reviews

This was one of the big ones that people were talking about outside my screening, and I also wonder if these same people saw Moulin Rouge. That didn’t really look like a nightclub in the middle of Paris, it looked stylized and cartoonishly fake. Likewise, Australia goes to great lengths to create scenes that aren’t meant to look “fake” exactly, but they’re meant to imitate the style of films from the 30s and 40s that often featured fake sunsets and night skies. Luhrmann is creating fantasy here, so why would he try going for photorealism? It’s meant to look larger than life, grand, and completely garish and fake at times. You’ve taken the twister into Oz, and it’s not meant to look like a documentary that was shot on location. Besides, the CGI attack on Darwin, which many people say looks fake, looked pretty darn realistic to me. It looked better than Michael Bay’s Pearl Harbor, and that wasn’t so shabby either. Maybe everyone should just go back to using miniatures so people will stop talking about CGI.

Nicole Kidman Can’t Act

“Why won’t Nicole Kidman’s face move?” Stephanie Zacharek - Salon

“Think Katharine Hepburn in The African Queen, without the facial expressivity. Geoff Berkshire - Metromix Chicago

These truly baffle me. I mean, Zacharek becomes so obsessed with Nicole Kidman’s face that she ends her review by talking about the nearly magical qualities of her ultrasmooth forehead. Either I didn’t pay enough attention to Kidman’s face or else it didn’t annoy me, but she had plenty of facial expressions to go around. She has looks that range from shock, to surprise, to anger, to adoration, to sadness… what do these people expect? No, she’s not as rubberfaced as Jim Carrey, but she certainly doesn’t look like a Botoxed angel made of alabaster. The last time I checked, this is the same Kidman who won an Academy Award for her role in The Hours. Do they think she’s had her facial muscles severed since then? I thought she did a bang-up job throughout the film, and yes, her face does indeed move quite a bit.