Two more days until we find out who wins this year’s Academy Awards! Okay, so the exclamation point is more than forced. It’s been quite awhile since we’ve had even an ounce of excitement about the Oscars. But we mustn’t let predictability get us down. Sure, even the still-uncertain races (Penn vs. Rourke; Winslet vs. Streep; Man on Wire vs. Trouble the Water) are anything but interesting, because the everyman of 2009 couldn’t care less about who gave the year’s better performance and would probably be fine shrugging his shoulders at the TV screen in the event of a tie (or, better yet, irresolution). However, there’s one thing people keep forgetting about the Academy: they’re full of surprises.

So, rather than just go with the easy, “predictable” predictions, we attempted to guess who and what will Crash the Oscars this year with a surprise victory — preferably the kind that adds an “ing” to “upset.” And once again, we’d like to extend the forecasting fun to you. What surprises do you expect and/or hope for? Or, if you’re down with the boring route, what “certain” winners do you truly believe in? And why? The most accurate comments will be reprinted in our final Oscar column on Monday.

Best Picture: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

If the Academy didn’t continually cause controversial commotion with Best Picture picks like Shakespeare in Love and Crash, we wouldn’t have very much to talk about the morning after, or years later. So, in a way it’s exciting and somewhat necessary to have the occasional baffling or infuriating upsets in the top category. The one film that would piss off more people this year than any other, even more than The Reader, is Benjamin Button, especially since it pretty much already had the (dis)honor of being an undeserving Best Picture winner 15 years ago.

Best Director: Stephen Daldry (The Reader)

If Benjamin Button is to win Best Picture, then Danny Boyle should probably still win Best Director, because often in the years of controversial Best Picture upsets the director’s prize still goes to the (critical) favorite. Think of Steven Spielberg in ’99 and Ang Lee in ’06. But just to prove the Oscars are completely out of touch, we have to go with the Academy favorites of Daldry and the Holocaust. Both Fincher and Boyle are Oscar newbies and may have their turn with some future, more lackluster effort.

Best Actress: Anne Hathaway (Rachel Getting Married)

For this category, we’re looking to the 2008 presidential election. Let’s consider Meryl Streep to be the older, more experienced, and typically well-respected candidate, who will lose to the young novice in her very first bid. Where that puts thought-to-be-a-lock Kate Winslet in the analogy is not important. As long as people keep mentioning Obama in their reasoning for why Slumdog Millionaire will win Best Picture, it’s just as fair to recognize Hathaway as the most Obama-like choice for Best Actress.

Best Actor: undetermined

As much as a tie in this category would be a surprising and slightly satisfying turn of events (even though it would be more appropriate in the Best Actress race, since Streep will forever be compared to Katherine Hepburn, who tied with Barbara Streisand 30 years ago), we’re looking to another political race of last year for the Best Actor decision. All we’ll know Sunday night is that it’s still down to Sean Penn and Mickey Rourke. But don’t worry, we’ll find out who actually wins in a few months.

Best Supporting Actress: Marisa Tomei (The Wrestler)

Just as Judy Davis probably deserved the Supporting Actress Oscar more for her performance in a Woody Allen film 16 years ago, Penelope Cruz probably deserves it more this year, also for a Woody Allen film. But Tomei is the champion of Oscar surprises, and we could very well see a repeat of 1993. At least this time she’s a little more worthy.

Best Supporting Actor: Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight)

Okay, there’s no chance of a surprise here. Because if the Oscar goes to anyone but Ledger, a crazed fan will likely blow up the Kodak. And the Academy must presume that Tommy ‘Tiny’ Lister won’t conveniently have access to the detonator this time.

Best Adapted Screenplay:  Eric Roth and Robin Swicord (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button)

Never mind the tremendous amount of work Roth put into expanding a very short story into a very, very long film. His and Swicord’s true triumph is in how they were able to rewrite Forrest Gump and repackage it well enough to fool $242 million-worth of moviegoers. Hollywood is surely obligated to reward the duo for pulling off such a double-tiered adaptation and such a well-played moneymaking scheme.

Best Original Screenplay: Andrew Stanton, Jim Reardon and Pete Docter (WALL-E)

Yes, a lot of people are predicting this to win the Oscar, and so it won’t be quite as much a surprise as a win for Frozen River would be. But the real shocker is going to be when Kung Fu Panda wins Best Animated Feature, a repeat of its glory at the Annies, and Academy logic once again goes completely out the window.