Despite bombing at the box office this past weekend with Jennifer’s Body, Oscar-winner Diablo Cody has a new gig to announce today. Of course, it’s not an original story like Jennifer’s Body, which probably did so poorly — in Hollywood’s eyes — for not being based on a familiar property or previously filmed material. Fortunately for Cody, she’s apparently always wanted to adapt the Sweet Valley High books, so both she and Universal are happy.

But are the fans? Personally, I’m not too familiar with the books, but if there’s anything I’d dread more than a beloved property being mined by Hollywood it’s a beloved property being adapted by Cody with her widely derided, trademark Diablo Codyspeak.

Between this, the promise of a future Archie movie and now the news that Universal’s also tackling a Barbie movie, it seems a big week so far for projects involving properties popular among young girls. I wouldn’t be surprised if Cody wants the Archie adaptation, too, especially if she’s familiar with its minor inspiration on Heathers, which is an obvious influence on her “clever” dialogue.

Of the three, though, I’d actually like to see her script the Barbie film, though it would then have to be an ironic and negative take on the doll brand (obviously a reference to the infamous “math is tough” catchphrase is very necessary) and also Todd Haynes would have to direct it.

Check out what the other film blogs are saying about Cody’s new venture after the jump:

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