Before you go to the polls today, you need to understand where the candidates stand on the really big issues. No, I don’t mean silly stuff like the economy. I mean the issues that threaten to plunge the world into an era of scorched, apocalyptic savagery. Sure, an ongoing war in the Middle East and gradual climate change are kind of scary, but how will Obama and McCain respond to the threats that can wipe out 99% of humanity overnight? These are dire times, and doomsday cinema has made one thing clear: this will probably be our last president before Armageddon sweeps from sea to shining see, so we’d better choose wisely.

After the jump we look at where the candidates stand on the issues, from Alien Invasion to Zombie Plague.

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Earlier this year, I thought that it was way too late for a Sex and the City movie. But then it made a ton of cash, so I guess I was wrong. Still, I’m going to continue similarly thinking it’s too late for another X-Files movie. And even if I’m proven wrong and the masses get out to theaters this weekend in search of the truth, I’ll keep on believing that X-Files: I Want to Believe is way past its time.

To celebrate Mulder and Scully’s tardiness, here are 10 other movies that came out too late:

1. The Godfather Part III (Released in: 1990; Should have been released in: 1976) - Never mind the fact that had this third installment been made years earlier, Sofia Coppola wouldn’t have been cast and therefore wouldn’t have given her terribly infamous performance. The more important matter is that sequels arriving more than a decade after the previous installment are almost always doomed. The longer the wait, the higher the expectations, and the greater the disappointment. Of course, not everyone agrees that it was also too late for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, Live Free or Die Hard, Rambo, Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace, etc.
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Jonathan Levine’s crowd-pleasing (in terms of audience awards at festivals, not in terms of uplifting Hollywood endings) film The Wackness opens in limited release tomorrow. In case you haven’t noticed from the ads and the soundtrack, it takes place in the New York City of 1994, a special time for the place because Rudy Giuliani had just become mayor and was beginning to clean up the city, Goldie Wilson-stylee (OK, not really Goldie Wilson-stylee, but who doesn’t love a good BTTF reference?).

NYC in the ’90s was quite special for me. It’s when I moved here. And moved here a second time (I’ve since moved here a third time), and watching The Wackness made me nostalgic for the decade. It also made me think of some of the other films from or set in that period, a number of which kind of define my experience with the city.

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With the New Hampshire primary upon us, and in response to the results of last week’s Iowa Caucus, I’ve been thinking about the possible influence of pop culture on Democratic voters. Is it possible that Obama performed better than Clinton because 24 is a more popular TV show than was the short-lived Commander in Chief? The former has so far featured two African American Presidents, played by Dennis Haysbert and D.B. Woodside, while the latter was about a female President, portrayed by Geena Davis. The next season of 24, which is set to premiere once the WGA strike is finished, will actually feature a female President, played by Cherry Jones, but it may be too late. Americans could already be set on nominating a black man, because they’re more familiar with seeing such a President on both the big and small screen.

And what a crop of African American actors we’ve seen as the leader of the United States: Morgan Freeman (Deep Impact); James Earl Jones (1972’s The Man); Tommy ‘Tiny’ Lister (The Fifth Element); Chris Rock (Head of State); Terry Crews (not so well known, but extra points for playing a porn star-President in Idiocracy); and of course Haysbert and Woodside. Now, let’s see who we’ve got for white female Presidents: Polly Bergen (1964’s Kisses for My President); Lisa Simpson (in a flash-forward episode of The Simpsons); Dulcie Smart (a TV movie called Post Impact); Ernestine Barrier (1953’s Project Moon Base) and of course Davis. Which group has more star power? Exactly. Even Robert Zemeckis chose to exclude the female President featured in Carl Sagan’s novel Contact when the director made his film version. Anyway, Clinton at least has a better chance than an African American woman. The only black female Presidents I can find in TV and film include one played by Melanie Henderson on an episode of The Electric Company and reference to one in a deleted scene from Star Trek V: The Final Frontier, which features the woman as an added fifth face on Mount Rushmore.