In a couple of weeks it will have been 25 years since Ridley Scott’s hammer-tastic 1984 commercial introducing the Macintosh was seen during Super Bowl XVIII. Though it wasn’t seen on television again until popular demand brought it back years later, it wasn’t for lack of quality. Ridley Scott was just coming off of Blade Runner, and the spot, which cost over a million dollars to produce, has been named the best television commercial of all time. Not too shabby.

But in a day and age of TiVos and DVRs, are commercials still relevant? In fact, it’s hard to remember more than a handful of commercials that have had the cultural impact of Scott’s 1984.

Ad agencies often turn to big talent to try and draw attention to a commercial, and the pendulum often swings the other way when Hollywood taps a commercial director to direct a feature. That’s what launched the careers of David Fincher, Michael Bay, and many other high-profile filmmakers. While 1984 might be the most famous commercial by a famous director, there have been a slew of others that have been equally as strange, from artists ranging from Spike Jonze to the Coen Brothers. Here’s a look at a some of the better ones, including both Ridley Scott’s 1984 (and it’s updated 2003 version, along with the Hilary Clinton version from last year’s Presidential race).

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Since I’m not a fan of Luc Besson any more than I am of Guy Ritchie, I’ve avoided the Transporter franchise from the start. Sure its star Jason Statham has a to-kill-for bod, but then that’s part of the action hero job description. And compared to hot he-men with a wicked, up-for-anything gleam in their eye like the Governator or The Rock or Daniel Craig, well, Statham’s just a little too bland for my taste. He’s someone you’d take home to mom for the holidays, not blow in an airplane bathroom along the way, having to dodge dirty looks at baggage claim upon landing. Never mind.

But after reading Chris Lee’s L.A. Times piece, in which director Louis Leterrier claims to have added a gay subtext to Statham’s character in Transporter 2, I knew I just had to take a peek. And surprisingly, for someone who can spot a gay subtext from as far away as David Beckham can score a goal, I couldn’t quite see what all the fuss was about. Statham’s gun-for-hire Frank Martin is too asexual to be homosexual; if he is gay he’s so far in the closet that even Alessandro Gassman’s sleazy, sexy villain Gianni Chellini (now that’s a name to scream in the heat of passion) couldn’t coax him out. Indeed, if there is anything queer about Transporter 2, it’s the character played by Italian stallion Gassman (a dirtier, XXX version of Antonio Banderas) who should be exposed.

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This review originally appeared during the Toronto Film Festival. Guy Ritchie’s RockNRolla opens in New York and LA today.

Guy Ritchie has been getting a bad rap ever since the his impressive double header of Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch turned into the double whammy of becoming Mr. Madonna in 2000 and directing Swept Away in 2002. Ritchie was quickly heading for the bargain bin after that romantic comedy became a universal joke, topped as a target of derision perhaps only by Gigli. He returned to gangster fare with Revolver in 2005, but even with star and Ritchie alumnus Jason Statham, the film wasn’t well-received. So here we are three years later with yet another gangster-studded film, RocknRolla, this time with posterboy Gerard Butler in a leading role.

Well, the good news is that this marks a return to the London underbelly that was laid down by Lock and Snatch: RocknRolla could rightfully be called the third film in a Ritchie trilogy. The bad news is that it’s a whole lot of flash and not much substance. Not that people go to Ritchie’s films expecting a dissertation on the human condition, but his movies do at least require you to follow along closely due to their labyrinthine plots. RocknRolla is no different, and although Butler seems to be the face of the film, he’s simply part of a large ensemble cast, and not the strongest player.

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• “Some believe that with the country reeling from the economic breakdown on Wall Street, moviegoers will go for comedy,” says Variety, which predicts My Best Friend’s Girl to top the weekend over Lakeview Terrace. Of course, there’s also Ricky Gervais yukking it up in Ghost Town, but The Hollywood Reporter notes that film has tracked so poorly that Paramount cut back its screen count. I guess moviegoers won’t go for just any comedy in depressing times.
• Forget all the rumors about Russell Crowe or Colin Farrell playing Watson to Robert Downey Jr.’s Holmes in Guy Ritchie’s adaptation. Jude Law is now reportedly in talks to play the detective’s associate. And so I must elementarily deduce that Sherlock Holmes will surprisingly not be a hit.
• The kid from A Christmas Story will make his directorial debut with Couples Retreat, which will star his usual collaborators Jon Favreau and Vince Vaughn, as well as Jason Bateman.
• Luke Wilson and Giovanni Ribisi have been cast in a film about the beginnings of the Internet porn industry. But will any of its target audience leave the computer long enough to go see it?
• Finally, though this isn’t big news, the 3-D animated adaptation of my favorite kid’s book of all time, Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs, has rounded out its voice cast with James Caan, Anna Faris, Bill Hader, Andy Samberg, Bruce Campbell, Tracy Morgan and Mr.T!. I can not wait.

Gerard Butler is serving as the posterboy for Guy Ritchie’s RocknRolla, but the truth is that he’s just one piece in the pie. He just happens to be the piece who has the added fruit filling of having starred in that little movie about Spartans. So, he’s now the de facto go to “face” for any film he’s going to co-star in.

He turns in a very solid performance as the down on his luck criminal One-Two in the movie, and unless he decides to play a role where he’s a homosexual struggling to break free from the bounds of oppression in Middle America, it’s as far as he can go to the other end of the spectrum from his turn as King Leonidas in 300. Check out the interview with him below and find out why he just can’t fake an orgasm.

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Guy Ritchie has been getting a bad rap ever since the his impressive double header of Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch turned into the double whammy of becoming Mr. Madonna in 2000 and directing Swept Away in 2002. Ritchie was quickly heading for the bargain bin after that romantic comedy became a universal joke, topped as a target of derision perhaps only by Gigli. He returned to gangster fare with Revolver in 2005, but even with star and Ritchie alumnus Jason Statham, the film wasn’t well-received. So here we are three years later with yet another gangster-studded film, RocknRolla, this time with posterboy Gerard Butler in a leading role.

Well, the good news is that this marks a return to the London underbelly that was laid down by Lock and Snatch: RocknRolla could rightfully be called the third film in a Ritchie trilogy. The bad news is that it’s a whole lot of flash and not much substance. Not that people go to Ritchie’s films expecting a dissertation on the human condition, but his movies do at least require you to follow along closely due to their labyrinthine plots. RocknRolla is no different, and although Butler seems to be the face of the film, he’s simply part of a large ensemble cast, and not the strongest player.

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Thus concludes our coverage of the 2008 Comic-Con International. If you missed anything, here it all is:

• Porn on the floor
• Jabba the Hutt
• Hoverboard for sale
• LEGO Batman
• Star Wars stamps
• Guy Ritchie’s comic book
• Pineapple Express and a brief history of stoner films
• Max Payne/Wolverine
• Twilight
• Red Sonja
• Nerd Barbies
• Tron 2
• Scream Like a Girl, hosted by Kevin Smith
• RocknRolla panel
• Guy Ritchie press conference
• Fanboys
• Watchmen
• The Wolfman
• Dr. Horrible (including sequel info)
• The Spirit
• Keifer Sutherland and Mirrors
• Judd Apatow, Kevin Smith, Zach Snyder, Frank Miller
• Watchmen: Dave Gibbons on Alan Moore
• Terminator Salvation
• Disney/Pixar
• Heath Ledger, the bobblehead
• Mummy 3, Death Race, Land of the Lost, Drag Me To Hell, Evil Dead
• Pineapple Express, Underworld, Quarantine
• Harold and Kumar
• Wes Craven and David Boyer
• Nightmare on Elm Street Part 209
• Hamlet 2
• Terminator Salvation press conference
• Troma at Comic-Con, Toxie in Iraq
• Interview with Gil Kenan, director of City of Ember
• Girls at Comic-Con
• Tropic Thunder
• Where was Star Trek?

photo: Guy Ritchie, Ludacris, Jeremy Piven, Idris Elba, Gerard Butler

During Thursday’s press conference regarding RocknRolla, Guy Ritchie was asked to describe his upcoming Sherlock Holmes film, set to star Robert Downey Jr. Ritchie said, “It’s going to be very contemporary… Originally Sherlock Holmes was this intellectual action man. I think what happened was they played down the action man aspect [in previous films] because they just didn’t have the means of executing the action in an interesting way. Well, we do have the means and we have the technology.”

So it seems that Downey Jr.’s Sherlock is going to kick considerably more ass than previous incarnations, but still be smart. Ritchie used the term “intellectual action man” several times, and while it is communicative, it’s also really clumsy. Let’s hope the full title doesn’t end up being Sherlock Holmes: Intellectual Action Man.

Maybe Ritchie’s fascination with tough guys who still visit the library comes from somewhere personal… More after the jump.

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Whether or not Guy Ritchie is soon to become the most famous male divorcee on the planet, at least he’s keeping busy. The filmmaker will be here at the Con this weekend promoting RocknRolla, his long awaited follow-up to the kabbalah gangster debacle Revolver, and Virgin Comics is here touting Gamekeeper, a Ritchie-created comic book which will, at some point, become a Ritchie-directed film. Though Ritchie apparently approves drawings and storylines for each issue, a Virgin rep told me that the filmmaker was “way more involved” with the recently released Series 2, which introduces a band of mercenaries known as “The Soccer Club.” Panels and buying info can be found here. Above and below: shots from the Virgin display on the show floor, where Ritchie is being promoted alongside Dan Dare and another unlikely comic star, porn star Jenna Jameson.

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Mike Jones has two sets of additions to the Toronto International Film Festival lineup at The Circuit. The first, detailing nine Gala and Special Presentations, informs us of the existence of a documentary about A Chorus Line, as well as the news (I *think* it’s news–I haven’t been following TIFF updates closely enough to remember what’s just been rumor and what’s been officially confirmed) that the festival will world premiere the Larry Charles/Bill Maher doc Religulous, and host the North American premieres of Guy Ritchie’s RockNRolla and Waltz with Bashir. Meanwhile, the other release tells us to look forward to the continental premieres of Delta (the incest-tinged Adam and Eve story from Cannes) and Tokyo Sonata, as well as a number of world premieres from Scandinavia, and much more. Click forth for the details.

• Robert Downey Jr will go straight from Iron Man victory lap to Guy Ritchie’s brave attempt to overcome his wife’s fatal pull Sherlock Holmes movie. The project is being fasttracked in order to beat that other Sherlock Holmes movie, the one with Will Farrell and Borat, to the screen.
• So much for “final offers”: the day after AFTRA ratified their deal with the studios, news breaks that the AMPTP has offered SAG a $10 million, retroactive-to-July 1 bonus if they agree to ratify the contract by August 15.
• The NY Times is getting a cash infusion by selling the development rights of their stories to Hollywood studios. The most recent story to go on the block (and the 15th in two years) is “This Strange Thing Called Prom,” a June 22 piece about students at a multi-culti Brooklyn high school preparing for the big night. Miramax bought it, but hasn’t yet attached any talent.

• Hancock is expected to make around $100 million this weekend, simply because Will Smith + July 4th = boatloads of money, regardless of negative buzz.
• SAG still doesn’t have a contract, but nobody seems to be particularly concerned. According to Variety, “There’s a ubiquitous sense among studio and network execs, talent reps and multihyphenates that SAG does not have the bedrock of support among its members to call for a work stoppage.” Meanwhile, Tom Hanks is supporting a ratification of the AFTRA deal, which would almost certainly nix any possibility of a SAG strike, whilst Jack Nicholson wants his compatriots to hold out for a better deal.
• Sacha Baron Cohen will play Sherlock Holmes opposite Will Ferrell’s Watson in an as-yet untitled comedy based on the detective stories. But they’ll have stiff competition from a competing Sherlock film being developed by the week’s most famous male maybe-divorcee, Guy Ritchie…right? [crickets]

Oh, the drama! Whilst a gossip blog of questionable repute allegedly has airtight evidence that maverick filmmaker Madonna has hired Paul MacCartney’s divorce attorney to sever her ties to Guy Ritchie, at the same time rumors are spreading that the soon-to-be 50 pop star is reteaming with director Alex Keshishian to make a follow-up to his 1991 tour doc Truth or Dare (known overseas as In Bed With Madonna).

I don’t know whether or not the two stories are related, and it’s probably best if we assume that both just aren’t true, but for the sake of argument: please, please, let Madonna make a (probably doomed, but noble!) attempt to recapture her floridly, gloriously shallow Truth or Dare era glory days by once again leaving a movie-making husband and forcing a no-name filmmaker to shape her everyday life into mall-grade Fellini!

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Guess what? Regurgitating gossip about Madonna and Guy Ritchie’s marriage is now fair game for movie blogs, because they’re both filmmakers now! Yay! Or, I mean, boo––I must protect my integrity and not get swept up in the promise of search-propelled page views. I don’t even know anymore! Oh, Madonna––life IS a mystery, isn’t it?

Anyway. Page Six is reporting that Madonna has fallen out of love with the man who remade Swept Away for her, because she’s realised that he’s not quite the street urchin she thought he was:

“Madonna is said to have lost respect for Ritchie when she found out he had embellished his past,” one in-the-know Briton told us. “Far from the tough, working-class London dude he adoringly echoed in Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, he’s actually a privileged, prep school boy who chose to affect a gangland accent and walk with a street swagger. Brits can spot this at 100 yards, or hear it in an accent. Yanks, alas, can’t.”

I’m sure I don’t speak for all “Yanks”––I am half-British, after all––but I always thought that *was* Guy Ritchie’s schtick, that he was a suburban kid who had as much first-hand experience with actual gun runners and gangsters as Quentin Tarantino had with hit men and Japanese mafia queens. Is that, really, the reason why the then-happy couple’s Swept Away was so awful––beyond the fact that Madonna was in it, beyond the fact that Lena Wertmuller’s film really didn’t need to be remade––because Ritchie couldn’t wrap his head around what was sexy (or funny, even) about a rich woman being dominated by a proletariat?