Is multi-medal-winning Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps the next action movie star? Or will he merely become a reality TV staple with the occasional cameo appearance in sports-related films? A recent Hollywood Reporter article weighed Phelps’ future celebrity options, and in response Entertainment Weekly asked its readers if Phelps could possibly be the next Brad Pitt (the magazine also looked at a couple Olympian-turned-actors in a recent slide show). However, while one comment recommended the swimmer for the role of Captain America (wouldn’t Namor or Aquaman make more sense?), it otherwise appears moviegoers are skeptical about Phelps’ chances in Hollywood.
Here at Spout, of course, we’re looking more forward to the Nastia Liukin-Shawn Johnson reform school flick (also discussed on this week’s podcast), but we certainly have room to anticipate the terrible low-budget action pics that Phelps is inevitably going to star in. It’s highly unlikely that he’d gain the stature of Pitt or the greatest athlete-turned-action hero, Arnold Schwarzenegger. So the question is, instead: does Phelps have what it takes to break through onto the list of worst athlete-turned-action heroes of all time? And will his worst fight scene look anything as bad as the following ten examples?
Fantastic Fest, held at the Alamo Drafthouse in Austin in September, announced a number of films and events today. As expected, the Jean-Claude Van Damme meta-biopicJCVD made the cut, as did the Leos Carax/Michel Gondry/Joon-ho Bong omnibus, Tokyo! Other highlights:
Wicked Lake, in which “four buxom ladies head out to the country for some good old-fashioned naked lesbian Wiccan frolicking.”
Fear(s) of the Dark, a collection of six animated horror shorts by acclaimed graphic novelists (see trailer above).
Santos, which has probably the most baffling film festival catalog capsule description I’ve ever seen: “A wild, sweeping tale of comic book nerds versus superheroes in a battle for the future of mankind. Think Ultraman with a Latin American brain transplant.”
Also: at 2pm EST today, if you’re on Twitter (check) and you’re planning to attend Fantastic Fest (check), you should send the following message to your followers:
I’m heading to Fantastic Fest (Sept 18-25)! Join me there and pass it on! New films and fun announced at http://www.fantasticfest.com
Those who mass tweet will be get themselves on the list for the Fantastic Fest opening night after-party.
GreenCine Daily alerts us to the news that the third season of Joe Swanberg’s Young American Bodies has launched at IFC.com. I haven’t had a chance to watch episode 1 yet, but I can almost gaurantee you it’s not safe for work.
Speaking of things you probably don’t want to be caught watching in public: a reminder of why no ultra-meta comeback can fully rehabilitate the Jean-Claude Van Damme of yore, who was such a cheeseball that he’d hump a girl on live TV, make a big show of covering up his apparent erection...and never once get around to taking off his sunglasses.
And to the department of at-work distractions: At Sergio Leone and the Infield Fly Rule, Dennis Cozzalio offers a 36 question movie quiz. Perhaps I’ll delve into this more deeply when I have more time, but for now, by answer to Questions 2, 5 and 24: Stanley Donen, Veronica Lake, and Lloyd Kaufman’s 42nd Street, updated to 2008.
We’re all aware that the ’80s action movie hero is back in full force in the 2000s. Stallone brought back Rambo, Bruce Willis brought back Die Hard’s John McClane, Harrison Ford just brought back Indiana Jones. But what does someone like Jean-Claude Van Damme do? He’s an iconic action star of the same period, yet he hasn’t a single iconic action hero role with which to stage a comeback. To us, he was always simply Jean-Claude Van Damme. Which is why it’s all the more appropriate that his big return is with a meta-movie in which he plays himself.
J.C.V.D.premiered at the Cannes film market this month (Karina showed us the teaser trailer pre-fest) and it’s been labeled a surprise hit. But does it deserve prime U.S. distro, or would it be more appropriate for it to go straight to DVD in America? As far as I’m aware, it hasn’t been picked up for either, yet. But anyone taking note of two excitable blurbs on GreenCine today should be hopeful that we’ll get to see it Stateside soon. My favorite of the two:
Variety points to a teaser for J.C.V.D., a tongue-in-cheek Jean-Claude Van Damme biopic starring the faded action titan as himself, which will be hyped at this year’s Cannes Market. According to the teaser’s YouTube page, the clip was put together for last year’s Cannes Market; according to IMDb, J.C.V.D. already has a French release planned for June, but U.S. distribution is apparently still up for grabs.
GreenCine Daily
