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10 Actors Who Shouldn’t Do Sex Scenes

10 Actors Who Shouldn’t Do Sex Scenes

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 4 months ago
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If you need to rest your eyes at any point during the 146 min. comedy epic Funny People, your best bet is to do it early during a sequence in which Adam Sandler’s character has back to back sex with a couple of female fans. The second of these scenes is mildly amusing, but there’s just no need to put the images in your head of either Sandler with a face full of breasts or the actor taking a girl from behind.

There are some actors we don’t need to see in a sex scene, humorous or otherwise, and Adam Sandler is one of them. He’s of a generation of comedic actors who starred in movies where they get the girl but where there’s no need for gratuitous sex and nudity. Unlike most of his successors, including Vince Vaughn, Owen Wilson, Paul Rudd and Dane Cook, he was never a pin-up in addition to being a funnyman. Even if he was better looking than some of his brethren, such as David Spade, Mike Myers, Chris Farley, Rob Schneider.

Still, Adam Sandler isn’t the last male actor we’d want to see in a sex scene. He’s not even in the bottom ten, which we present in a list below:
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FUNNY PEOPLE Review

FUNNY PEOPLE Review

Karina Longworth
By Karina Longworth posted 4 months ago
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Judd Apatow’s Funny People feels like an attempt to graft the writer/director/producer’s patented brand of semi-raunchy character comedy of latent male adolescence on to the template of a certain kind of studio film rarely made today — think 1980s Oscar bait, like Terms of Endearment, The Accidental Tourist or even Beaches: the gently melancholic dramedy in which someone in early middle age is suddenly forced to reconcile their lives. This unlikely hybrid serves as the vehicle for a meta-epic work of autobiography that pays tribute to one of the writer/director’s oldest friends/collaborators, diverges into a love letter to his wife, contrives to get the wife and the friend in bed together, and then drags in Eric Bana to get them out. All the while, Seth Rogen is milling about, mostly as a surrogate for the filmmaker, until he suddenly switches over and starts speaking for the audience — during the film’s draggiest stretch, he is very vocal about not wanting to be there.

If this sounds bizarre, it is. What’s more bizarre is that this mix of personal project-as-product actually succeeds — at least intermittently. Though not formally bifurcated, Funny People practically plays out in two sections (another 80s flashback: it feels like the kind of film that used to come packaged on two VHS tapes). It peaks emotionally at about three-quarters of the way into the first section, makes good on track laid in that scene about a third of the way into the second section, and then rapidly devolves from there into a domestic sitcom that can only resolve itself in a “girls may come and go, but bromance is forever” fade out. The film is so self-referential, so quick to pounce on and twist what the audience thinks it knows about Apatow and his players (from multiple references to Seth Rogen having recently lost a lot of weight to Adam Sandler repeatedly begging Rogen to show him his dick) that to reaffirm the bond between two men this way almost seems like an act of defiance. “Yes,” Apatow seems to be saying. “This is a movie about me, and yes, my primary concern as an artist is platonic male love. So … suck it.”

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Seth Rogen Feuds with Entourage. Today in Film Bloggery 07/21/09

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 4 months ago
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Whenever I watch Entourage I wonder how Turtle can get so much play, even if he is friends with a big movie star like Vinnie Chase. He’s fat and obnoxious and … okay, so I don’t need to get into a fight with Jerry Ferrara, the actor who plays Turtle, so I’ll stop right there. But I will say that I found it ironic and hypocritical that the show is in the news today for being similarly dubious of Seth Rogen’s attractiveness to Katherine Heigl in Knocked Up. I also find it interesting that Entourage could be so harsh about a movie star without that person showing up on the show and being in on the mockery (as is typically the case). Instead, Rogen is apparently upset enough about the jabs that he’s been vocal about an appararent longstanding feud between him and Entourage creators Doug Ellin and Mark Wahlberg to the E! program Daily 10. In addition to calling the Entourage gang “assholes,” he claims “it’s on.” Of course, Rogen doesn’t need to be so defensive since he got the last laugh by losing so much weight and becoming far more successful in the past two years than anyone associated with the HBO series (including Wahlberg).

Still, despite Rogen being the victor so far in the feud, I do hope it escalates until climaxing in a streetfight reminiscent of the massive battle in Anchorman (which Rogen appears in, though not in that scene). The Apatow gang vs. the Entourage boys, with eventual appearances from the State guys and the Broken Lizard troupe, etc. Maybe someone will even die by trident if we’re lucky.

Check out other blogs’ commentary on the feud after the jump:
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Latest Judd Apatow Viral Marketing Creates Misguided Fanbase. Today in Film Bloggery 05/28/09

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 6 months ago
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I’ve always been a fan of the kind of reflexivity employed in Hollywood-set films and TV series where we get a glimpse of a title, a poster or even a trailer for a fake movie existing only in the world of the characters on the screen. Often these mock productions are spoofs or otherwise parodic in some way, and they provide great humor to the entertainment we’re watching. I’m not always a fan of these gags being used for viral marketing purposes, however, especially if the clips we see on the web are the same we end up seeing in the movie. It kind of ruins them for when they’re put into the context of the whole story. The whole practice also seems to be overdone nowadays. Between last year’s overload of mock films in Tropic Thunder and the failed attempt at using such marketing for How to Lose Friends and Alienate People, I think Hollywood should take a break from the self-parody for awhile.

Judd Apatow, who often uses viral marketing for his films, dropped his latest fake production on us this week, though it’s not for a fake film; it’s a double-edged look at the fake NBC series Yo Teach! And besides coming along after the concept has been done to death, it also seems to miss the point. While seemingly trying to come off as a parody of sitcoms, it actually looks like something a lot of people want to watch. As a Head of the Class fan growing up, I’m one of these people. As lame as the show is in concept, it’s pretty decent in execution. And it makes us kinda wish Jason Schwartzman — and Apatow — were back doing TV work rather than the depressing comedy that Funny People, for which this fake TV show was invented, threatens to be. These viral videos are basically a bullseye, just on the wrong target.

A great many other film bloggers would also like Yo Teach! to really exist. See the responses after the jump:

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Date Rape Jokes to Hurt Seth Rogen’s Box Office? Today in Film Bloggery 04/08/09

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 7 months ago
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What’s funnier, cancer or rape? That’s a trick question; neither is funny. And in the past 24 hours I’ve seen concerns for two Seth Rogen movies because of how they involve these unfunny subjects. Of course, I doubt the cancer comedy Funny People will turn as many people off as much as the date rape joke in Observe and Report.

If you’ve seen the red-band trailer for Observe and Report, you’ve seen the gist of the joke, which has Rogen pause mid-intercourse because he thinks Anna Faris’ character is unconscious. She’s apparently not, though, and scolds the guy for stopping. Yes, it’s black comedy, and yes, it makes sense as a joke in theory. But neither Faris’ seemingly conscious outburst nor the audiences’ laughter make it okay, according to some people who will not be going to see the movie this weekend or ever.

Few blogs are writing about the date rape issue surrounding the movie, but those that are have received a few interesting comments, all of which make me wonder if Observe and Report’s box office could be even slightly hurt by the joke. Certainly there have been successful films featuring total scumbag protagonists (Gran Torino is one example, though its character’s racism isn’t necessarily played for laughs), but does this one really appear to be saying that the scumbaggery is forgiveable in certain situations? After reading Faris’ thoughts, watching Rogen’s apologism and reading the comments below, let us if you’ll also be avoiding the movie as a result of its misogynous humor.

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Diablo Cody and Her Fempire. Today in Film Bloggery 03/24/09

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 8 months ago
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“When you read a screenplay, it doesn’t come with a picture on the cover,” said Adam Siegel, president of Marc Platt Productions, a producer who is friends with all four women and has worked with all except Ms. Cody. “I know a few beautiful women, but none of them write like Dana, Liz, Lorene or Diablo.”

The above quote is the best part of a New York Times piece from the weekend that made me throw up a bit in my mouth despite how delicious it is (this happens a lot to me with Mexican food, but rarely Times articles, even those in the Sunday Styles section). I would have used it for the Bloggery earlier, but of course Nikki Finke was more important yesterday. Coincidentally, there’s something about this profile on Diablo Cody and her “Fempire” that relates to the Finke story, at least to how Jeff Wells responded to Kim Masters’ take, claiming that if Finke was a guy she never would have been attacked in such a way.

Similarly, Cody and Co. wouldn’t be written about if they were men. But more importantly, they probably wouldn’t have been written about if they weren’t such good-looking women. So, while there’s something empowering about this foursome of female screenwriters who each boldly wear an identical necklace with an inscription that reads “Fuck My Face,” it was quite necessary to include a lot of tantalizing quotes about them seeing each other naked and sometimes being “super porno” like. And of course that double-edged quote from Siegel above. And another condescending (to men and women) bit from the piece’s author, Deborah Schoeneman, describing Elizabeth Meriwether (scribe of the upcoming Friends With Benefits) as “a thinking man’s Scarlett Johansson.”

If you recall, some had believed Cody only won so many awards from critics and peers because of what she looks like (and the profession she used to have). So, perhaps Oscar nominations should have also gone to Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist and What Happens in Vegas? Related, would this article have been as interesting if the “Fempire” included Cody’s less-hot Oscar competitors Tamara Jenkins and Nancy Oliver?

More reactions to the piece from others from the last few days after the jump:

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Jon Hamm as Lex Luthor. Today in Film Bloggery 03/11/09

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 8 months ago
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We at SpoutBlog love Jon Hamm tremendously, but we don’t get to write about him much because we’re primarily a film blog and don’t feature much discussion of either Mad Men or 30 Rock (we’ve slipped praise into posts here and there, of course). Fortunately for us, Hamm has made a new video for FunnyorDie.com, in which he references movies. Specifically, he portrays Lex Luthor and alludes to plot points from Superman: The Movie, Superman Returns and even Superman IV: The Quest for Peace.

And as if this video (watch it after the jump) weren’t funny enough, we can now hopefully look forward to Hamm appearing in more Judd Apatow-related comedies — at least if the guys at Vulture have any influence. Or, maybe Hamm could actually be cast in a future Superman movie (was this video a response to requests for Warner Bros. to make him the new Man of Steel?), as either hero or villain — or both!?!?

Again, check out the clip and what other bloggers (some TV bloggers, but whatever) are saying about it after the jump:

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Judd Apatow and His Funny Friends. Today in Film Bloggery 03/02/09

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 8 months ago
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Between the new Vanity Fair spread starring his comedy troupe (which includes his wife) and official word that he’s producing Ghostbusters 3, Judd Apatow is the talk of the Internet today. Eric D. Snider, in a new post at Cinematical that is apparently unrelated to either bits of news, even discusses Apatow’s potential status as this generation’s John Hughes. Considering some bloggers refer to the stars of the Vanity Fair feature as the “Frat Pack,” despite that term’s origins being with another set of actors (though Apatow’s pals do overlap and have been deemed “Junior Varsity” members), there may be weight to Snider’s claim.

Whatever Apatow’s group is called (Vanity Fair simply yet prematurely labels them “Comedy’s New Legends”), their leader is certainly ruling over a large part of Hollywood these days, enough that he’s sure to appropriate more than just the Frat Pack name before he’s done with his reign as King of Comedy. Now that he’s borrowed the talent of Adam Sandler (for this summer’s Funny People) and is about to take charge of even older SNL alum (for the next Ghostbusters flick), what could stop him from hiring Anthony Michael Hall or Shirley Maclaine in order to align himself with even the “Brat Pack” and “Rat Pack,” respectively?

We’ll just have to wait to see how much Apatow will ultimately conquer. So, for the time being, let’s take a look at what the blogosphere is saying about him and his crew today:

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10 Supporting Characters Who Deserve Their Own Spin Off

10 Supporting Characters Who Deserve Their Own Spin Off

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 9 months ago
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If Tyler Perry gets an Oscar nomination for his acting in Madea Goes to Jail, can a washed-up actress scold him for taking away female roles? Actually, could it just be Cuba Gooding Jr. in drag, a la Boat Trip?

Seriously, though, Madea won’t be up for any Academy Awards next year, but damn is Perry’s character popular. Enough that the sassy matriarch has now evolved from a supporting character into the star of her own vehicle (which gave the filmmaker his biggest opening yet this past weekend). Yes, it’s true that Madea is a central figure in most of Perry’s films and has previously been the main protagonist in his plays (including the one Madea Goes to Jail is based on), but in the movie world she was introduced as a secondary role in Diary of a Mad Black Woman. So, now she belongs in that small club of supporting characters who’ve earned their own film(s); other members of which include Jay and Silent Bob, Bruce and Lloyd, Cousin Eddie, Marshal Samuel Gerard, the Scorpion King and Wolverine.

And Madea is one of the very few female characters to belong to the club, which is another good reason for an actress to scold Perry. But the problem also lies with the people who write woman characters, apparently, since in coming up with ten other supporting characters who deserve their own spin off, we managed to only include two females on our list. Perhaps if we’d permitted classic film characters there’d be more to choose from — though even then we might be more likely to include a Peter Lorre or a William Demarest role than a Thelma Ritter or Eve Arden.
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Harrison Ford: What Now?

Harrison Ford: What Now?

Kevin Kelly
By Kevin Kelly posted 11 months ago
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Harrison Ford’s newest movie Crossing Over opens this weekend may never open ever (see comments below — Ed.) and it looks like a mashup of Babel and Crash. In the trailer, Ford seems to be going through the motions of a role we’ve become used to seeing him in: the gruff older man who gets angry about something and decides to take matters into his own hands. It’s most reminiscent of his Jack Ryan character in Clear and Present Danger, right down to shots that look pretty darn close to each other.

It’s more of a reminder that so many of Harrison Ford’s films in these past few years have fallen flat on their face both with audiences and at the box office. He tried to do comedy with Anne Heche in Six Days, Seven Nights, and again with Josh Hartnett in Hollywood Homicide. Neither one of them worked. He also missed with the romantic drama Random Hearts and the drama/actioner K19: The Widowmaker. There was brief respite from his lackluster roles with What Lies Beneath, but then he turned to mediocrity with Firewall. Then came the new Indy, which granted, wasn’t his fault. He was great it in, but the writing was just too bad to get past.

Crossing Over doesn’t look like it’ll bust Ford out of the boring movie mold he’s encased in, so here are some suggestions for him to turn things around. Despite the fact that this guy could retire tomorrow and live off of his earnings forever, he seems intent on continuing to act. Let’s hope he pays attention.

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Secret Michael Cera Movie Debuting at Sundance. Trade Roughage 11/26/08

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 1 year ago
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5 Filmmakers Who Deserve an Economic Bailout

5 Filmmakers Who Deserve an Economic Bailout

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 1 year ago
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Catherine Hardwicke hit one out of the park for female directors this past weekend, but she had a lot of help. Not only was she working with a pre-sold property, she also had a very manageable budget of $37 million. Quite different from the $2 million she had to work with on Thirteen a few years back. Of course, she had similar budgets on Lords of Dogtown ($25 million) and The Nativity Story ($35 million), and both were box office disappointments. Still, she’s going to keep on being trusted with more money — if Summit is smart they’ll keep her on for at least the first Twilight sequel, which will surely come with a higher price tag — and as long as she continues with genre films, she’s sure to remain a profitable director.

Not every talented filmmaker does well with more money. Danny Boyle, for instance, typically bombs with bigger budgets. And a lot of foreign auteurs strike out when handed costly studio-produced genre or franchise pics (Jeunet’s Alien Resurrection is a favorite example). But there’s the occasional filmmaker who, like Steven Soderbergh or Christopher Nolan, can make something worthwhile out of any budget they’re allotted. And then there are the many indie filmmakers who quickly find themselves at home with modestly priced broad comedies, such as the case with Seth Gordon easily transitioning from the Slamdance doc The King of Kong to the star-studded Hollywood holiday pic Four Christmases, out this week.

Who will be the next small-scale filmmaker to successfully rise up and prove him or herself worthy of bigger budgets? SpoutBlog has selected five directors we’d like to see given an economic boost, each because he or she would likely deliver something more interesting and popular than the usual Hollywood product.

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5 Directors, 5 Achilles Heels

5 Directors, 5 Achilles Heels

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 1 year ago
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While watching Zack and Miri Make a Porno, it is possible to occasionally forget that you are watching a Kevin Smith movie. Mainly because he doesn’t show up in the film, a rare and appreciated move for the guy who has played “Silent Bob” in 6 out of the 8 theatrical releases he’s directed. Then there’s the cast that is involved, which makes Z&M seem like the offspring of Judd Apatow and John Waters. But there are a number of things that do make it clearly a Smith joint, such as the obligatory employment of Jason Mewes — in the role he was born to play, even moreso than “Jay” — and the potentially pitying use of Jeff Anderson, who may have been the only actor to agree to receiving that accidental Hot Carl.

And then there’s the most recognizable element: Smith’s inability let the poop jokes go in order to concentrate on his characters, and the relationships between them. It’s the filmmaker’s Achilles heel, and it’s one of five we at SpoutBlog have noticed are holding back the esteem of five would-be better directors.

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Apatow Offering “Sethrogenization” Services to Aging Comedy Stars

Karina Longworth
By Karina Longworth posted 1 year ago
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As I’ve noted before, it’s easy to assume that Kevin Smith cast Seth Rogen in Zach and Miri Make A Porno in an effort to capture some of the magic dust that makes Judd Apatow’s films so financially successful, while remining the audience that Kevin Smith movies have offered a blend of raunchy comedy and surprisingly traditional romantic resolutions for a decade and a half now. In a post today at Burbanked, Alan Lopuszynski questions whether Adam Sandler is currently starring in Judd Apatow’s Funny People for the inverse reason.

“At first, I figured that Sandler’s interest in working under Apatow as a director was because Sandler was on a downslope of box office returns at this point in his career,” writes Alan Lopuszynski at Burbanked. But then he got out the virtual graph paper, and realised that although Judd Apatow’s films are vastly more appreciated by critics than Sandlers, “the pair’s financial track records are extremely similar” — and when there has been a discrepancy, Sandler’s films have almost always grossed more than Apatow’s.

And so Alan coins a term to explain the collaboration:

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Ghostbusters as Girls. Casting Call

Ghostbusters as Girls. Casting Call

Christopher Campbell
By Christopher Campbell posted 1 year ago
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In a new interview with MTV, City of Ember star Bill Murray has called for the makers of Ghostbusters 3 to introduce a female Ghostbuster. My first thought was that hottie who models the sexy Ghostbusters Halloween costume, but seriously it is a great idea. As long as the concept is to pass on the proton packs to a new generation, there really should be an actress in the bunch. And I’m not talking just a hot young flavor of the month who Hollywood thinks will get the teen boys in the audience (it’s Ghostbusters 3; they’re already sold). I agree with Murray that the main requirement should be a funny female.

However, instead of merely picking out one comedienne to appear in the sequel, SpoutBlog has decided to imagine a remake of Ghostbusters in which the entire team is made of women. So, here are some casting choices for a gender-reversed version:

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