Forget trying to maneuver your way through all the mixed reactions to Watchmen crowding the interweb today. There’s only one question you need to answer, apparently, in order to make up your mind whether or not to see the highly anticipated adaptation: are you okay with a massive blue penis in an R-rated comic book movie, or will you be offended and demand an apology from the MPAA? Over at the site Movieguide, which is partnered with The Christian Film & Television Commission, organization chairman and “spokesmen” (is he multiple people?) Dr. Ted Baehr is quoted as saying Watchmen should have received an NC-17 rating for its constant display of male anatomy, and he claims the MPAA has agreed to bring the complaint to their ratings board. And finally, with the defensive against nudity being necessary to any film, Baehr says, “After all, would ‘Casablanca’ become an even better work of art if the script contained a bunch of “f” words, or if Ingrid Bergman appeared completely nude? Definitely not!”
Well, personally I wouldn’t have a problem if Bogie cursed a lot, though I agree that Bergman was always great despite always having her clothes on. As for the blue penis issue, though, I have to remind folks that blue-skinned nudity is not the same as realistic flesh-colored nudity, and that whether it’s Rebecca Romijn in the X-Men films or a digital replica of Billy Crudup in Watchmen or the eagerly awaited Smurfette shower scene in Sony’s upcoming Smurfs movie, the ratings board will likely be okay with it. As will most anyone else that doesn’t have a lame obligation to excessively puritanical groups like the CFTVC.
Sample quotes and links from those internerds who disagree with Baehr, as well as some who actually agree, after the jump:
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Today’s Extremely Improbable Rumor Sourced From The British Tabloids: NOW Magazine is reporting that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are “looking at remaking Last Tango In Paris.” It’s apparently part of a gambit to shore up the public perception of both halves of Hollywood’s most routinely questioned couple by having them appear together in “a movie that has a mainstream plot, but also some intense sex stuff.”
At the Guardian, Xan Brooks not only buys the rumor, but is all about it. Well, maybe not the Last Tango part, but the Cruise-on-Holmes on screen action in general. “The thrill is gone and they need it back. They need to have sex on screen, to prove their love,” he writes.
Because the couple who makes a movie sold on the idea that its stars Really Do It stays together, right? Just look at Eyes Wide Shut! (OMG, they should remake that. And then Far and Away. And then Days of Thunder.)
Due to the unsurprising popularity of our “10 Movies Sold on a Sex Scene” list a few weeks back, I’ve decided to unleash a sequel. However, catering to both Spoutblog’s traffic and the interests of ever-abundant sex-attracted internetters is only half my reason for this follow-up list. I was mainly motivated by the outcome of the release of Woody Allen’s Vicky Cristina Barcelona, a film that also initially inspired the first list. While Vicky was partly sold on the promise of a threesome between Scarlett Johansson, Javier Bardem and Penelope Cruz, it is now fortunately being celebrated, and it will likely be remembered, primarily for Cruz’s performance. Not for the threesome or for the lesbian kiss.
Other movies sold on a sex scene, though, are not typically so blessed with accolades. And even some that are recognized with high praise at time of release are often later forgotten as anything but fodder for MrSkin and other followers of onscreen sex and nudity. Obviously this means that most of my selections for the previous list may also qualify here, yet I’ve chosen to ignore some certainly fitting titles, including The Brown Bunny and 9 1/2 Weeks, so as not to repeat myself.
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