A few days ago, Erik Davis of Cinematical Tweeted that he was watching Rambo: First Blood Part II, and he made a comment about how if Robert Rodriguez’s Predators doesn’t work out, he’d get behind a Rambo vs. Predator film. I thought the idea was a little silly since that’s basically what the original Predator was, only with Arnold Schwarzenegger instead of Sylvester Stallone. Little did either of us know that Rambo V: The Savage Hunt would end up involving a half-human, half-beast adversary that does seem to be like what Davis had in mind.

One thing appears to be different, though. Apparently Rambo (Stallone) is going to the Arctic Circle to battle the creature, which aligns it more with the first Alien vs. Predator movie. Sure, it’s the wrong Pole but the same climate and terrain — superficially anyway. Oh, and here’s another thing that’s slightly different: the creature isn’t an alien; it’s a secret governement genetic experiment gone wrong. In the poster, made before the official synopsis was even revealed, it looks like a werewolf.

The only thing more ridiculous would be for Rambo to fight teenage vampires, though I think werewolves may actually be the hip new thing as dictated by Twilight, so that might not be any more silly or popular. Hey, going sci-fi worked for Indiana Jones, right? And Rambo is even getting a young “hunting partner” in this installment. Maybe it’s actually his son?

Check out what the other film blogs are saying about this crazy Rambo V scenario after the jump:

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We’re starting to hear some positive buzz about G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra. Apparently it doesn’t rape or ruin your childhood; rather, it may make you feel like a kid again. This is what a toy/cartoon adaptation should do, we guess, but we still wish they’d made a Reagan-era-style war movie instead of a CG-heavy action blockbuster with too much comic relief. Because even when we were little we knew the property was a young person’s version of the conservative, Cold War-informed military pictures of the 1980s. And if Rambo could get his own Saturday morning animated series, why couldn’t we get a hard-R-rated G.I. Joe after all these years?

We know the answer to that question, but that doesn’t change the fact that we’re disappointed. See, while others might feel GIJTROC has ruined their childhood by being too unfaithful to the action figures and show, we feel it’s ruined our childhood because it isn’t the movie we dreamed of. So that’s how the following list of films was selected. Instead of going for all the obvious remakes and video game adaptations (we’ve never cared about games), we’re focusing on movies that really turned our beloved films, comics and cartoons of our youth into something we’re now almost embarrassed to ever admit we enjoyed.
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We’re all aware that the ’80s action movie hero is back in full force in the 2000s. Stallone brought back Rambo, Bruce Willis brought back Die Hard’s John McClane, Harrison Ford just brought back Indiana Jones. But what does someone like Jean-Claude Van Damme do? He’s an iconic action star of the same period, yet he hasn’t a single iconic action hero role with which to stage a comeback. To us, he was always simply Jean-Claude Van Damme. Which is why it’s all the more appropriate that his big return is with a meta-movie in which he plays himself.

J.C.V.D. premiered at the Cannes film market this month (Karina showed us the teaser trailer pre-fest) and it’s been labeled a surprise hit. But does it deserve prime U.S. distro, or would it be more appropriate for it to go straight to DVD in America? As far as I’m aware, it hasn’t been picked up for either, yet. But anyone taking note of two excitable blurbs on GreenCine today should be hopeful that we’ll get to see it Stateside soon. My favorite of the two:

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The 9th Annual Golden Trailer Awards were held in Los Angeles last night with what seems like a thousand winners announced in all sorts of categories representing movie marketing. There were awards for trailers, TV spots and posters divided up by genre (comedy, drama, horror, independent, etc.) and technical achievement (sound editing, motion graphics, etc.). While having too many categories can lead to questions of consistency — how does The Dark Knight beat out Iron Man for Best Action trailer but the latter film wins the Summer 2008 Blockbuster award? — it’s interesting to know which film’s ad employs the best music (The Diving Bell and the Butterfly) and which has the best voice-over (The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford).

Regarding Jesse James‘ win, though, I have to wonder how a film’s marketing can be so great if it doesn’t actually bring in an audience. In addition to its trailer being honored, its poster also won in the Best Drama category. Plus (and this is me just being picky), isn’t awarding the trailer’s voice-over a bit unfair considering it just utilizes part of Hugh Ross’ narration from the actual film? To me, this category should probably be honoring those “In a world … ” trailer voice-over guys. Nonetheless, I do love the trailer and the film and so I’ve included it for repeat viewing above.

Of course I understand that the Golden Trailers are more an honoring of craft than of successfulness. Still, if the trailer for In Bruges and the stencil poster for Rambo are the most original works in film marketing in the past year, we need some new designers right away.

Check out the list of winners and nominees after the jump

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Here I present you with yet another Sundance trailer. But it’s for a film that screened at Sundance LAST YEAR. I know, I’ve already bitched recently about having to wait so long for Sundance darlings to make their way to theaters, but I can’t help complaining again. Not when it comes to Son of Rambow, the movie I heard so much about during the 2007 festival and couldn’t wait to see for myself. And then it never came, and I forgot about it for awhile. Hopefully, I can wait just a bit longer (and not forget again in the meantime) for Paramount Vantage to finally give it a limited release on May 2nd.

At least now I have some more time to get around to seeing the original First Blood and the other Rambo movies I meant to watch (because I’ve never seen them before) prior to the release of the new Rambo (which, as a result, I also didn’t end up seeing). Son of Rambow is probably still an enjoyable movie without being familiar with those iconic Stallone movies, but since it’s about two kids making a spun-off sort of movie titled “Son of Rambow”, it seems like I’ll appreciate it a little more if I know the inspiration.

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According to Channing Tatum’s official website (no, I’m actually not a regular visitor, but I guess it wouldn’t be a stretch to assume that I spend my free time collecting information on a young, strapping “naturally talented dancer that taught himself how to dance by attending coming-of-age parties in the Hispanic community called Quiceneras when he was growing up in Tampa, Florida”), Kimberley Pierce’s troubled Iraq war drama Stop-Loss will be screening (premiering?) at the SXSW Film Festival in March.

Stop-Loss, Pierce’s first film since the Oscar-winning Boys Don’t Cry in 1999, was initially supposed to open last fall. According to various blog posts, it was then bumped to early March, then to April, and is now scheduled to open on March 28. When the first trailer for the film appeared online in October, Anne Thompson wrote that the Stop-Loss team were “heaving huge sighs of relief that they did not go out this fall, where they would have gotten lumped in with all the other ’serious’ ‘Iraq’ movies.” But regardless of timing, the film has already been damned, to some extent, by synopsis and marketing campaign alone.

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• Daniel Day-Lewis and Julie Christie continued their winning streaks over the weekend, each picking up the top individual prizes at the Screen Actors Guild Awards. The WGA had issued SAG a waver to allow them to produce a telecast with professional writers, which thus made it cool for stars to show up, which thus created the conditions for this photograph of Angelina Jolie in what appears to be a tie-dyed chiffon sack, thus giving credence to recent rumors that she may be carrying two new doses of Pitt spawn.
• Of the many “specialty” films which expanded their theater count in hopes of capitalizing on Oscar nominations, only Atonement failed to see a bump in percentage this weekend, with The Savages gaining 2% even as it shed screens. But the real story of weekend in the indie box office realm––which Variety buries at the very bottom of their writeup––is that Cristian Mungiu’s Cannes-winning, Oscar-ignored drama 4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days earned $48,176 across just 2 screens.
• Ben Fritz gets off a nice joke about Sylvester Stallone being an “ancient warrior” in his mass-market box office writeup, but it must be little comfort to the team behind Rambo, which opened in second place behind something I had never heard of called Meet the Spartans.  Cloverfield dropped almost 70% in its second weekend, which makes sense considering the film’s hype peaked six months ago.

• The lineup boasted a wealth of warmed-over Hollywood pics (1408, Planet Terror), but the top prize at the Locarno Film Festival went this weekend to Masahiro Kobayashi’s controversial drama, The Rebirth. The Hollywood Reporter’s Eric J. Lyman called the film “cerebral and weighty … one of the most talked about films of the festival, but it was not without its detractors, who were turned off by the film’s deliberately repetitive construction.”
• Millennium Films, the company that’s currently working on bringing the Rambo series back from the dead, will next concentrate on resurrecting the Conan series.  They’re planning “multiple pictures”, the first of which will go into production next spring.
• Sean P. Combs Esq. has signed on to exec produce that Biggie Smalls biopic.
• Ever hear of Movie Gallery? Yeah, that’s part of the problem. The long-shot competitor to Netflix and Blockbuster says it still hopes to launch DVD-by-mail and video-on-demand services within the next six months, despite admitting “substantial doubt as to our ability to continue” operating.

After spending a chunk of the morning wading through treatises on the socio-political implications of Bruce Willis blowing up a skyscraper, I got to thinking about franchises. I don’t think they’re a bad thing, in theory (and, if you want to get theoretical, definitely check out this post from David Bordwell’s blog, in which the legendary film academic solicits thoughts on sequels from a roundtable of colleagues). You could certainly accuse the sequel-happy studios of laziness–I always mentally cut to a shot of a Disney executive furiously trying to find a summer tentpole to greenlight so he can go on vacation: “Eh. They bought Johnny Depp as a pirate before–maybe they’ll do it again.” But it’s hard to complain about any of this when the audience continues to turn out for franchise films.

So the question becomes, “What do people like about sequels? What are they hoping to see?” If the lure is in large part one of wish fulfillment–if any significant segment of the audience goes to see X-Men 12 because there’s something that X-Men 1-11 didn’t accomplish that they’re still hoping to see–then won’t the success of sequels as a genre fall in direct proportion to the rise in user-generated video? Basically, if fans live in a world in which they can appropriate, manipulate, and juxtapose characters, images and ideas from their favorite films in order to meet any desires left unsatisfied by the original films, why would they then bother to leave the house and pay $12 in order to see an authorized sequel?

Think about that while you watch this Rambo vs. Predator mashup. If a dude with iMovie can pit Stallone against the ultimate opponent, what else is there for John Rambo to accomplish?