The Spirit drove straight into Tanksville last weekend, earning only $6.5 million dollars. But before we can claim that we saw it coming and gloat over its still-warm corpse, it might just be a sign that old-school comic book / radio / serial heroes just can’t make it with today’s audiences. Why is it that Batman and Superman can rake in hundreds of millions of dollars, but heroes that are arguably just as interesting end up tanking at the box office?

Producers have tried to revive the nostalgic exploits of the cadre of “The” named heroes of yesteryear ranging from The Lone Ranger to The Shadow, but each time the box office take has been far less than the studios had hoped for, and the grand plans for a franchise of movies, action figure tie-ins, and a breakfast cereal get canceled. Below is a list of the high-profile attempts to revive old heroes that have fallen flat on their masked faces.

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• Tom Cruise is potentially re-teaming with Valkyrie screenwriter Christopher McQuarrie on up to three projects, including another WWII flick that would put Cruise in the pilot seat again, Flying Tigers. Cruise is likely happy with the initial reception of Valkyrie, though sticking with McQuarrie for so long may keep him from diverse roles. The other two projects include the espionage drama The Tourist and the adaptation of the 60s TV show The Champions, which deals with super-powered spies.
• Frank Miller is re-teaming with Odd Lot Entertainment for a dark Buck Rogers movie that he’ll write and direct. The announcement comes just in time, before an onslaught of bad reviews of The Spirit join Variety’s pan.
• Stephen Chow will no longer direct but will still co-star in The Green Hornet. Apparently his creative differences don’t extend to his onscreen role of Kato. Maybe this is co-scribe and star Seth Rogen’s chance to try directing?
• Clearly wise to how The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is beating Australia in the kudos department, Baz Luhrman is taking on his own F. Scott Fitzgerald adaptation: The Great Gatsby.
• Jim Carrey will beat Will Smith at the box office this weekend, simply because his film, Yes Man, is a comedy. In other theatrical release news, the four-hour version of Che has been so popular that IFC is keeping it in cinemas another two weekends before separating it into two films.

We got a quick, edgier look at Quarantine before an uneventful visit from the cast of Underworld: Rise of the Lycans. And then the real entertainment began, as Judd Apatow, Seth Rogen, James Franco, Danny McBride, David Gordon Green, Amber Heard and Evan Goldberg took the stage for inane questions yet plenty of laughs.

Highlights:

- Though Kate Beckinsale is not in the new Underworld prequel, star Rhona Mitra says her skimpy outfit in the movie should keep fans satisfied.

- David Gordon Green apparently directs his actors with commands like, “do it like you’re taking a shit.”

- Coming soon: an episode of The Simpsons written by Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg.

- Rogen continues his career playing druggies and drunks with The Green Hornet.

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